This is a blog called “meditations.”
Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius wrote down his private reflections, compiling a philosophical guide that would ultimately be called Meditations. My mission for this blog is to write down some of my private reflections in public, in the hopes that you might gain something. If you’d like to meditate with me, in the sitting and breathing sort of way, I’d love to have you in one of my bi-weekly group healing workshops.
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6. The strength of our currency.
What is this place, after all? Well, it’s a beautiful playground given to us by the creator of all things. Each moment we have here is precious, so long as we don’t forget how precious it is meant to be. Humans, over time, have developed incredibly complex systems and structures designed to create order and keep the peace. Along the way, we’ve lost the most important piece — the reminder that all things are one.
5. Silence, betrayal, and changing the world.
Before this pandemic, we decided that we could change the world, in our own little way, and we set out to do that. In the midst of this pandemic, we continue to try. We continue to create spaces to soothe the collective consciousness out of mass hysteria and into calm. We are more forthcoming with our time, our energy, our resources and our gifts. Speaking for myself, I have figured out how to do things in real time, learning how to lead healing workshops online through the process of leading healing workshops online, because suddenly the excuse that something seems challenging or I’ve never done it before doesn’t seem like enough.
4. A lesson from my imaginary friend.
Yes, dear reader, I know that we are (pretending to be) adults here and have no business making up imaginary friends to live our lives for us. We have to live our lives for ourselves. But, I will offer you the possibility that there is still merit in externalizing some of your decisions for the sake of taking the weight off of your own shoulders. If you do that externalization through the process of writing, you’ll get the bonus of feeling really, really confident speaking your truth. I imagine there’s some kind of truth living inside you, and I know that truth is too juicy and full of life to just stay inside you. We need to hear from you.
3. Harvesting a rose.
I had already started this website, and it became more clear than ever that I had to leave grad school and re-direct that energy towards growing into a spiritual teacher and healer. It is quite literally my soul’s purpose and my life’s work. I got my birth chart read by a professional, (something I had set up a few days before the RSB but which happened afterwards), and she confirmed that I was simultaneously a great student, a great teacher, and a healer for the collective. I believe I would’ve been an incredible academic who would have done groundbreaking work. It just wouldn’t have been MY work.
1. Learning to cook and learning to cry.
One of my favorite meditations is “change” by the app Stop, Think, Breathe. This was my very first meditation app, and it came to me at a time when everything about my life was, well, changing. I was 19 years old, regularly having panic attacks and living through untreated PTSD. I’m careful here to say untreated, but not un-diagnosed. I had been diagnosed the year before, and would go on to be diagnosed multiple times by multiple therapists. I had simply stopped going to therapy because I believed it was not a good use of my time. I believed I was doing ok, because I was able to get up and go to class and sure I was miserable but I was productive and being miserable is fine because that’s just life, life is hard. Right? Exactly.